Just a Kid

Last night in the car around 2am when Jennica and I were driving back to Winthrop to get a couple hours of sleep (which proved to not be enough for my body, as I soon found out by waking up at 10:37 when I was supposed to be at Butler at 8...but that's another story that has already been heard by anyone who reads this. That's done. I'm okay with this morning. It just furthers my emotions of my previous post and reinforces the fact that our Butler Motion actors and worship leaders are phenomenally dedicated and on top of things when it comes to getting the message of Christ out to kids), I was talking about some of the things that are stressing me out lately with my relationships and friendships and church and school and blah blah blah. Once I got all of that out of my system and we got out of the car, I was walking and it hit me that sometimes I forget how young I am. I'm just a kid.
I really think I'm at an age where I can still claim a tiny piece of childhood. I'm still dependent on my parents, and I still get really really excited about things and jump around and play with kids and run around in snow. I'm still just a messed up ball of hormonal emotions. But I'm also at an age where I can claim adulthood a little bit. I can vote. I can get a real job. If I wanted to, I could live in an apartment and pay for rent and everything. I have to make adult decisions and be a little bit more mature about some things (not that I'm good at it).
So this morning, in between periods of hyperventilating, I was thinking about how much of a kid I am. And I realized that I'm just a child. I've always loved the image or metaphor for people of God as His children. He's given us the ability to make our decisions and to be grown-ups, but at the same time He is the Ultimate Protector, who has to pick us up and take care of us and help us make the right decisions. I like the whole idea of free will, even though I'm very sure we often make wrong choices, but I don't care if you're 5 or 50, you're still a child of God. You're His precious, tiny, finite, dependent, child who can not stand on their own when it comes down to it. And He continues to pick us up and help us continue to move forward towards Him, and especially today, I'm so thankful for that.

[I am a child in the eyes of God
and I have been broken by the weight of Love
so I am running into the arms of the One.
I am a child in the eyes of God]