October 4, 2008

I really wish I blogged more. I have a lot of thoughts in my head lately about possible blog topics but nothing ever really seems to come to fruition.

But I did want to make a small, quick post about my life lately. Things are really awesome, and God is incredibly good.
I have a bad habit of feeling ashamed of things I want to say (or write) sometimes, and I'm trying to break that. Sometimes I keep my feelings and my emotions on the inside because I think that someone or everyone will disapprove of whatever I'm thinking or feeling. I'd really like to get out of that habit. I don't have much to say, but here's what's going on lately in my life:

-Robert and I are finally officially dating, and it's the best thing I've ever experienced. God has definitely blessed me with this relationship, and I'm very excited to be learning and growing closer to God with Robert by my side.

-I'm absolutely 100% in love with what I do at Elevation. Being a part of a worship ministry like this is unreal, and I wouldn't trade it for any other role. I don't know how I even made it to this point, but I know God is good and has given me an unbelievable part of something huge.

-For the longest time, I've been struggling everyday with the concept of God's love. I just could not understand or comprehend how or why this Creator of the universe would choose to love me unconditional. I mean, I believe He does love me, but sometimes I have a hard time living like it. However, this week has been absolutely wonderful for me. I listened to 3 different Perry Noble sermons throughout the week and they all spoke directly to me about about something I very desperately needed to hear. I found this really entertaining because they were 3 completely different sermons (Can I Lose my Salvation? How Do I Know God's Will for my Life? Is It Ok for Christians to Drink Alcohol?) but they all spoke a similar thought to me and backed it up: Jesus does not love me based on my performance. Jesus loves me just because.
This week has been awesome. That's such a simple point, but knowing it and repeating it has been so great for me. This week I spent way more time reading the Bible, praying and just generally noticing His glory in the seasons changing around me. It's been fantastic. So at this point, I just need to remember that the God of the universe is in love with me and is pursuing me every day and out of love for Him, I must respond.

So those are the 3 biggest things going on in my life right now. God is teaching me a lot, but not always in the form of solid, tangible, explainable lessons.